


Let it Fall

by TheWritingGiant



Category: Chicago PD (TV)
Genre: F/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-11-02
Updated: 2020-11-02
Packaged: 2021-03-09 00:22:01
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,572
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/27355675
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/TheWritingGiant/pseuds/TheWritingGiant
Summary: Unable to sleep Hailey lets her mind drift one late winter's night.
Relationships: Jay Halstead/Hailey Upton
Comments: 4
Kudos: 82





	Let it Fall

**Author's Note:**

> I really, really want it to be winter, that really the only excuse for this.

Hailey woke up suddenly and completely; it was still dark out, not that that meant much in January in Chicago. Two in the morning or six, there was little difference. While her insomnia was typically worse in the summer months, it bugged her more during the winter, when she could never gauge how much sleep she was probably going to miss. With a silent sigh, she eased her way out of the warm bed, careful not to disturb the sleeping figure next to her, and headed to the kitchen. She had developed a routine after years of dealing with the disorder; make tea, add a little dollop of honey, and sit somewhere where she could stare out the window. She always liked the last part best during the winter and that night was a prime example as to why; it was snowing.

She settled into the lone recliner in the living room and watched as the snow fell over the Chicago skyline in thick fluffy flakes. The weather service had said they were going to get nearly a foot by the morning. Hailey knew she was in the minority, but she loved it when it snowed like this. It was like someone turned down the volume of the city, as a thick blanket covered her corner the world. After a few sips of tea and letting her mind drift with the falling flakes she finally looked at the clock, it was just past four in the morning, and she was very likely up for good. Like her therapist had taught her years before, she played the days events through her head to see if she could pinpoint any specific stressor.

Intelligence was called out to a murder bright and early that morning. A man, Thomas Ray, had been beaten, bound and dragged up and down his street behind a car. It wasn't an easy scene, but also wasn't the worst one they'd ever seen. Mr Ray had been a freelance journalist, who had written a few exposés in recent years, taking down a prominent attorney and a couple of aldermen, but none of that was why he'd been killed. Thomas had a neighbour, Alicia Kilbright and her daughter Julia; only that wasn't their real names. 

The Kilbright's were in WITSEC, they were really Ashleigh and Shauna Keane, out of Boston. Ashleigh's ex-husband, James, was a hitman for Irish Mob, and six years earlier she'd had given testimony against her husband. Her and their young daughter had been in the program ever since. Over the years the Kilbright's, or rather, the Keane's, had gotten close with their neighbour. Thomas was a friendly, good looking guy, who, like them, had no family in the city. A bond developed. They had dinner together most nights. Thomas would go to Julia's dance recitals, he helped her with her homework and taught her and her mother how to ride a bike over the summer. All their neighbours thought Thomas and Alicia were together, but they never took that step. A part of Alicia never wanted to, because well, she wasn't really Alicia, she was Ashleigh, and she didn't want that secret to putting Thomas in any danger. But that's just what happened.

James' conviction had been overturned, and almost immediately, he'd come looking for his wife and daughter. They still weren't clear on how he'd managed to find them, but he did. He watched them for weeks and thought the same thing as all their neighbours, Thomas and Alicia or Ashleigh, were screwing, and that would not stand. Thomas' untimely death was a warning to Ashleigh from James, he was here, he knew where she was, and she was his.

Ashleigh had been heartbroken; she blamed herself. Thomas had been a good man; he deserved so much better than them. But he hadn't thought that, at least not according to his journals, Hailey had shown them to her. As Thomas recorded his thoughts each night, he often referred back to her and her daughter, how sweet they both were, how good a mom Alicia was, how great a person, what funny but oddly insightful little kid thing Julia had said in just the moment he needed to hear it. What they got up to together, plans and ideas for the future, something he wanted to surprise them with. And just a frequently he'd mused about finally taking the plunge and asking her out on a date, but he'd always talk himself out of it. 'We're friends,' he'd written. 'That's what she needs, that's what they need. Being there is enough, so long as they're happy.'

"I would have said yes in a second," Ashleigh had whispered, her fingers tracing the words on the page. Then she took the journals and her daughter and met with the Marshalls to be brought to their new life. Hailey hoped it would have a happier ending.

"You okay?" a deep voice snapped her out of her thoughts. 

Jay stood in the doorway; hair rumbled, sweats hanging low on his waist, eyes still bleary with sleep, she smiled at the sight. She knew that her partner looked good in practically everything, from tact gear to suits, but sleepy Jay was one of her favourites. They'd been dating for a few months, ever since she'd gotten back from New York, and nights apart were becoming fewer and farther between, so it was a sight she was treated to often.

"Yeah," she looked at the clock again. She'd been sitting in thought for nearly an hour. "I woke up and was wide awake, yay insomnia."

Jay offered her a soft, sleepy smile and approached the chair. Without a word, Hailey stood, as he made himself comfortable in the cushions, she resettled in his lap, leaning into the warmth of his chest, her head tucked in the crook of his neck. They let the silence fall over them like the snow outside, calm and peaceful. It was the kind of silence that was easy to get lost in, as they so often did. Hailey listened to his heartbeat, while Jay played with strands of her hair, and together they watched as the snow continued to fall.

"Can I tell you something, even though I'm pretty sure you already know it?" Jay broke the silence with a whisper sometime later.

"Of course."

"I love you," he said simply. "I am head over heels, deep in the thick of it, in love with you Hailey Upton," he pressed a kiss to her head. "But you already knew that."

Hailey smiled and squeezed his hand. "I did know that, but it's nice to hear. Can I tell you something that you already know?"

She felt him nod. "I love you too," she twisted, so she was straddling him and wrapped her arms around his neck. "Deeply and completely, Jay Halstead, and I don't want to be any other way."

His next kiss landed the dimple of her right cheek. "You're right; it is nice to hear."

"Not that I'm complaining," Hailey carded her fingers through his still messy hair. "But what brought this on?"

"The case today," he shrugged. "He was so in love, so was she, but they were too afraid to take that leap. It's just kind of tragic, y' know?"

"What's that quote," she hummed. "'The saddest word in the world is almost,' or something like that."

"That could have easily been us."

"I know," Hailey assured. "But it wasn't."

"I just think we take advantage of time," Jay tucked piece her hair behind her ear. "We always think we have more of it. We always want more of it. But we never seem to learn to stop wasting it." He shook his head. "I've known for a while that I loved you. I was just waiting for the right time to say it. But after today, that just seems so stupid; there's never a wrong time tell someone you love them."

"Oh, there totally is," she countered with a smirk. "But I know what you mean. Thank you for saying it."

Hailey leaned forward and sealed their lips together. She threaded her fingers through his hair; it was too short for her to get any kind of purchase, but she loved how the short strands slipped like silk under her fingertips. When they eventually pulled away, she rested her forehead against his and stroked the backs of her fingers over his faint stubble. 

"Think you're gonna be able to get back to sleep tonight?" Jay asked, his eyes fluttering as he tried to keep his tiredness at bay.

"I doubt it," Hailey whispered. "You should go back to bed though; you don't need to stay up with me."

He didn't say anything, just wrapped an arm around her waist as he leaned forward to grab the afghan off the couch. He secured the blanket around them and laid the recliner back as Hailey settled on top of him. They fell quiet again, Jay's fingers twisting in the ends of her hair as the snow outside started to come down harder and faster. Soon enough, Jay's fingers stopped moving, and his breath evened out. Hailey grinned and dropped a kiss to his chest, snuggling further in his warmth. She wouldn't sleep that night, but she didn't really care, she had the snow, and that easy silence with the man she loved, there wasn't anything better.

**Author's Note:**

> We've had our first wintery blast where I live, and it wasn't enough. I want the snow and lots of it. Thanks for reading.


End file.
